MEDIUMS, B-ROLL AND BOYFRIENDS

LIFE OF A BOOKMAN

Bookman: 1. a person who has a love of books and especially of reading. 2. a person who is involved in the writing, publishing, or selling of books. Oh, hi that's me!!

Shipwreck and Survival: The final book of my Daunt book subscription came in the mail! (GREAT gift idea for book lovers btw!!) The book picked for me is Marilyn and Maurice: An extraordinary True Story of Love, Shipwreck and Survival. I stayed up past my bedtime reading it last night. It's one of those that reads like fiction even though it's a completely true account of what happened when a newly married couple sails from the UK to New Zealand. I have been transported to what it would be like to be on a boat for that long – and can confirm, not my cup of tea. But so far this read is interesting and sweet and concerning...I'll let you know my full review next week!

WOMEN’S STUDIES

What gets passed down becomes our history.

An Existential Guide to Making Friends This is easily one of the top 5 best things I've read all year. Which isn't surprising given that it came to me from one of my favorite people who is an endlessly joyous example of friendship (h/t Libbie Summers!!). I love the tension that this writer holds in the challenges of adult friendship...the humors in it...and things that ACTUALLY make friendship work. A few of my favorite lines:

A friendship is mostly b-roll. Errands, waiting for buses, being wrong about directions together...share silence without leaping to fill it with facts about magnesium (this made me laugh out loud. Because, well, I'm always trying to fill silence with “have you tried magnesium”)

Walk...All theology of Friendship is pediatric.

Everyone is tired...Put Crisps in a bowl. Friendship is logistics performed tenderly.

Highly recommend you read this, all of this. And then send it to one of your friends.

Is Having a Boyfriend Embrarassing Now? British Vogue sparked some serious backlash for this piece about why women aren't posting their boyfriends online. It's interesting! As someone who has chosen to not post photos of a partner – I can say that it 1) drums up questions 2) makes a breakup way easier 3) removes the whole hard launch thing off the table. Highly recommend! But the bigger chatter about this piece comes from sentiments like “having a boyfriend typically takes a hit on a woman's aura”...LOL.

The Fat Talk Principle I love this video so much, because as I've gotten older the social connections that matter so much to me are the friends who are GOOD with how they are, what they look like and who don't socially bond or find power by hating on their weight...hating on their face...hating on their ageing – and only talking about weight-loss and augmentation as a means to connect.

PASS IT ON

Stories are heirlooms. Here's one of mine: One of the ways that I do not fit in with my friends is that they all LOVE Halloween and costumes. And I do not. I never have. We can unpack that later. But I do love a spooky story, and on Oct 31st it was Daisy's 165th birthday!! Which reminded me of a little moment that happened a few years ago when Daisy was just a draft on my computer. I went to an event and was chirping away about the book I was working on. A woman came over – that woman as it turns out was a medium – and said while I was talking a small woman with a pointed nose, brown hair, and from another time stood behind me. She wanted me to know that she's very happy I found a way to include “that quote at the end of the book” and that she's delighted with how the story has turned out. She feels it has done her justice.

Well, take a look at what daisy looks like. And take a look at the final direct quote in the last chapter of the book. Mmmmmmhmm. I couldn't form words. I was so freaked out!!! But also so delighted because the thing I worried about most while writing was making Daisy proud. And apparently, I did.

Woman on xx