OCTOPUS, CARDS, SCALP WINS, AND UNNECESSARY KINDNESS

LIFE OF A BOOKMAN

Bookman: 1. a person who has a love of books and especially of reading. 2. a person who is involved in the writing, publishing, or selling of books. Oh, hi that's me!!

Tilt: OK I'm still reading Tilt, by Emma Pattee's which follows a the main character's journey across town after a major earthquake destroys Portland. Next week I'll give you my full-tilt thoughts ;)

What I've been writing: Honestly, my writing was not front and center last week, BUT I did do a whole bunch of Instagram script writing. Not sexy, but something that must get done because wow, putting out reels every day is a lot. of. work. Many of you have asked me about this (my) new resurgence on the gram (and tiktok, and youtube), and...well...it really comes down to one thing. I have spent the last 8+ years writing really great books in service of women, in service of making sure women's stories don't go untold, and for those stories to get seen they need to get seen. And where do things get seen? Exactly. And thus, if you want to like and follow along on Instagram, TikTok and Youtube, I'm sending you BIG AIR HUGS FOR DOING THAT.

WOMEN’S STUDIES

What gets passed down becomes our history.

Running Cowboy, Revisited – Same Old Lang Syne. My friend John wrote this beautiful essay on unnecessary kindness, and I debated sharing it with you (I know!! SO unkind of me!!!) – because John writes about a small, “unnecessary kindness” that I showed him...and while I'm typically fine being the center of attention this hits a little different. But John's words are very moving about what it means to show up in this world, in our little corner of the world, with small offerings. This past week has been excruciating, on a personal level for a dear friend in my life (and our friend's pain is our own pain), and I won't even begin to comment on our collective pain and outrage watching fellow Americans killed by ICE...but these are times when lovely words by lovely humans can bring us back to finding the loveliness in connection with each other. And we need more connection with each other <3 Read's John's post about a small book I tracked down, and the joy I had in doing so. And as he so beautifully writes, “Grief doesn’t end, but it does change shape, and sometimes it’s other people who help reshape it for us, whether they know they’re doing it or not.“

Itchy, flaky scalp? Head and Shoulders probably isn't the solution. I'd like to say this is some lighter content, but if you've ever had your scalp killing you one itchy, flaky scratch at a time...there's nothing light about it! jkjk My dear friend Anne-Marie took my “omg please write about scalp care” plea and d-e-l-i-v-e-r-e-d. If you didn't click and subscribe on her post the last time I recommended Not Born With It, this is the time. And if you don't want to listen to me, listen to my friend Pam (who writes the great design Substack a Birdie told me) who texted me a big ole thank you for helping her find Anne-Marie's content. I'll be awaiting all of your thank you texts ;)

The Egg Makes the Decision. The myth that male sperm decides fertilization, whichever one races the strongest and fastest to the egg wins, is pervasive. And untrue. Research shows that in fact, the egg determines which sperm is allowed in to fertilize. This piece goes into how strong women are, even from the moment of conception – the egg is sending out a chemical signal that draws its ideal sperm in. FASCINATING, and challenging so many of the stories we've been told.

We need to talk about Brooklyn Beckham. h/t to my friend Anne-Marie (see above, scalp savior) for sending this one my way. I know last week I said I wasn't going to link to the gossip, but this is more of a fun breakdown of each line of the wild Instagram Stories Brooklyn Beckham posted on his account (which if you're brand new to this saga, one google or this link will solve that for you.)

PASS IT ON

Stories are heirlooms. Here's one of mine:

To know me is to know that I LOVE handwritten notes. Some weeks, for no real reason, I write less notes than others. But truly nothing brings me more joy than keeping USPS in business. However, over the years thanks to my dear friend Astronaut Kate, I've really leaned into NON-stamped notes, using little leave-behind note cards. Over the years, she and I have experimented with the right size, colors, finishes, but this week she gifted me the PERFECT cards with the PERFECT little design, that she created as an adaptation to a broach I got with her in Paris – a lovely, gold Octopus that I wear...all the time. These cards are perfect. And to bring it all the way back to John's piece at the top, they were both an unnecessary kindness that she made something so personal and thoughtful for me...and in doing that, she created a whole stack of unnecessary kindness cards waiting to be distributed to those I love. Let love ripple on!!!

Woman on xx