DESIGN, LOVE STORIES, AND PUTTING THE BOOK DOWN

LIFE OF A BOOKMAN

Bookman: 1. a person who has a love of books and especially of reading. 2. a person who is involved in the writing, publishing, or selling of books. Oh, hi that's me!!

Unfinished books: I stopped reading The Ministry of Time by Kaliane Bradley midway. I put it down. I tried to read it poolside in Tulum. I tried to keep reading it on the plane. I brought it with me to the beach every day for five straight days in Hawaii, and I couldn't get into it. Sometimes, books don't hit. And I have no problem putting them down without having to justify why. I recently started reading Background for Love by the early 20th-century publisher Helen Wolff, first written in 1932. I'm already very into it. What happens when a woman gets entirely over her love interest, mid-road trip, and settles for a cottage in Saint-Tropez instead? Tell me, Helen!!!

What I'm writing: I realized yesterday that I've been getting stuck in Evangeline writing because I'm wanting too badly “to get it right” – as in, I can see where my messy pages are a mess and it's causing me to get very in my head. This week I'm choosing mess over perfection, and just going to write it ugly baby!

I also wrote a little thing, by hand, because this weekend's world events were hard on the heart, so I turned to a notepad for warmth about something I know to be true: Your best friend is a love story, too. Transcribed it for your enjoyment below:

Your best friend is a love story, too.

Squeeze her hand when you drive by the place where you first met, the burger spot downtown that has $5 beers on college football Saturdays. Neither of you likes beer. Or watch football. Or eat burgers. A miracle you were there at all.

Save the postcards she sent from Tokyo and Vienna, and Amman, places she visited with her “other” friends. Send her postcards, too.

Know the exceptions to her rules. Olives are always a 'no', but olives in a martini, a 'yes'.

Bring the good wine over on a bad day, the one from le chai, the corner shoppe that you've branded lehaim.

Call about nothing, about how the baked cheese and avocado sandwiches are $13.90 now.

Know her org chart, people you've never met yet know everything about. Like her boss's boss Frank, who has a problem with exclamation points and the backbone of a Wheat Thin.

Intervene on her behalf. Ghostwrite her response that makes the ex-boyfriend feel like the total fool that he is.

Keep a quotebook of inside jokes. Nothing's better than a runback to stupid things you've both said.

When she calls for advice on renewing her passport, remind her that nothing matters as much as a good photo. That thing lasted ten years.

Travel together. Get food poisoning in Rio, matching berets in Paris, and corn-on-the cob in Bali.

Leave love notes on the counter for her to find tomorrow, once you've left. Let the tears be ugly and beautiful when you say goodbye.

Hug her tight, hold on after she's let go. The time is precious. The laughs aren't always endless. Right now becomes a memory, so write it all down. She is your love story, too.

WOMEN’S STUDIES

What gets passed down becomes our history.

Accidentism, the philosophy of chance. I heard Kara Swisher talk about how every billionaire's home she's ever been into looks the same: like a beautiful hotel lobby. The design so perfect it lacks the originality of its owner. I've always wondered what aesthetic philosophy encompasses:  and this is my great-grandmother's chair, and this is this textile from Vietnam, and this is a piece of art from my travels. Well, in this article, I found it, and in the definition of “Accidentism” – the philosophy of change. And in that, I found the design principle for my home! Also, this was just a lovely read on how to balance comfort and warmth.

What made Roger Federer's commencement speech masterful. I didn't watch his speech, but I LOVED this breakdown of what made it work. Like centering the message around a counterintuitive statistic + narrative that he only won 54% of his points. Barely over half, one of the most celebrated tennis champions to walk the earth. And how he practiced his face off for this address. Oh, if I could tell that to every person I ever speechwrite for (I will). This was not just a craft piece; it was also terribly inspiring for us normals.

The Law of Resonance. Calling all my woo woo gals!! This was a good one on the importance of our energy. Of tuning into something beyond the material. Of why, when people walk into my home and say “the energy is so good in here”, it matters. I just smudged last night, and in the corner of the upstairs that I've always felt to be a little dense, energy speaking, the sage smolders popped, POPPED. I rest my case.

They asked ChatGPT questions. The answers sent them spiraling. Just read it. It's wild. And concerning. And good, so you can be aware of your own life, or those whom you love, if they're leaning on the bots a little too much. There are risks.

PASS IT ON

Stories are heirlooms. Here's one of mine:

I've been consuming too much on my phone. It's not even social media! It's just endlessly absorbing content, news, think pieces...but it all massively impacts my ability to actually think. So I've been trying to do less staying in the know and more staying in the now. I put my phone in a drawer on Sunday, went on walks with no podcasts, and carried around a yellow notepad for writing and doodling. And it felt so good.

I know there's nothing novel about distancing yourself from the internet, from your phone, and from digital spaces...but when you do it makes life feel novel all over again. With texture. With slowness. Put your phone in a drawer this weekend. 10/10, I highly recommend.


woman on xx