ALLIGATORS, BOP HOUSES, AND LETTERS TO A YOUNG POET

LIFE OF A BOOKMAN

Bookman: 1. a person who has a love of books and especially of reading. 2. a person who is involved in the writing, publishing, or selling of books. Oh, hi that's me!!

Hello from the other side: What a way to go by Bella Mackie, is a book I picked up randomly. And I keep trying to re-pick it up to read it, but I'm not super motivated. I'm not sure why?? This is a crime novel about the death of wealthy patriarch Anthony Wistern, told from the perspectives of his self-absorbed family members and an obsessive true-crime podcaster, all of whom have motives for murder....but like none of them feel super believable? Nor do I like any of them? That's probably my issue...I love (need?) a likeable character involved. I don't read to hate, I read to love!!
Permission to change my mind, but I'm probably going to move on.

Instead, I've been browsing through one of my all-time favorite books Letters to a Young Poet (this is probably the book I gift the most) which if you have not read, READ. Rainer Rilke, a famous poet of the early 1900s, wrote 10 letter to a 19-year old poet who asked him to critique his work(bold). Rilke didn't critique a thing, he did something better: gave him a pep talk. He reminded him to stop asking people if your work is good and to live that question instead. You can literally read this book in an afternoon (and you should). Bc he's writing about what it means to do the hard and lonely work of becoming yourself, of liking yourself, before the world gives you any validation as to why you should. So ya, if you're in a season where you're waiting for someone to tell you you're ready (hi, me? always?) this is the book that will make you stop waiting. Hence why I'm always re-reading lolol.

What I've been writing: Well, Evangeline is f*cked right now. She is in some REAL hot water, of her own doing. There were warnings!! But she did not listen!!! And it's so fun getting her into trouble. But when it comes to seeing the end of the story finally coming together, I am not (f*cked, that is)!!!

WOMEN’S STUDIES

What gets passed down becomes our history.

Is the Swipe Era Over? You know you're single when everyone wants to talk to you about this podcast episode. LOL. And my response to all those people is, “Yes, wild. Agree with basically all of it. And so, is there someone wonderful you'd like to introduce me to then?” Because look, everyone is happy to say 'you need to lean into the friction of IRL' BUT what all this coverage is missing is what about people in relationships (as in, the friends of single people) who also need to lean into the discomfort and friction of setting up their friends with people they know, their friends, their friends' friend, their coworkers, etc, knowing it may not work out. What about the friction of that? So, I would say this isn't just a single person problem, this is a community issue!! Listen and lean in people (and send me your hotties??? jkjk...sorta)

There's a new AI model for women's health I really wanted to get excited about this. About the potential for women's health to be seen and prioritized, especially as we witness a technology takeoff with AI. But wow, I read this release for Oura on the backside of listening to this Hardfork Podcast about how the government is ushering us into a dystopian future by bending the leading AI companies to their will. And all I could think of is what happens when they then decide to tell Oura, give us everything you know about women's menstrual cycles, or else. In a post-dobbs world, legal experts have already flagged this data as potentially subpoenable in abortion related prosecutions. So, gd what's a woman to do to get some funding for research on our bodies instead of an AI model that makes us wildly vulnerable to abortion surveillance.

A women's economic crisis hiding in plain sight. I can't find anyone reporting on this Brookings data, but I read the ENTIRE report and wtf. 86% of workers most vulnerable to AI, with the least ability to recover as assessed by these expert researchers, are women. And not just any women, women who can't pivot as easily due to the markets they're in, and who have modest savings and limited skill transferability compared to other jobs/people on the displacement scales. AND, this comes at a time when social safety and federal job transition programs have been cut, not expanded. Women, by the numbers, are already economically vulnerable, and this report just scared the bajeezus out of me. You're welcome for passing the freaked-out buck.

Do you know what a BOP house is? If you're regularly around young girls on TikTok (your nieces, your daughters, your best friend's daughter, your sister), then you need to know that 1) a BOP is a “Baddie on Point” and colloquially it's someone using TikTok and Instagram like a creator, but she's using these platforms to push that audience to pay her on OnlyFans. And regularly, these are young women, that under-18 women are referencing in their style, their aspirations, and who they're following/looking at. I have SEARCHED for cultural commentary, and it's getting widely ignored. If you see anything, send it. But for now, give a look at this piece so you know what's happening. Young girls are not properly protected on these platforms, and we need to get amongst understanding their digital life – not because sex work is bad, but bc the algos are pushing mainstream glorification of online sexwork that safety and education infrastructure is not ready for.

Write your book in alpine chalet with my writing coach?? My amazing writing coach Julie Artz has teamed up with a NYT bestselling novelist to whisk you away to France and help you plan, or write, or revise your book. And you should go. If I wasn't already booked in October, I would be there. So I'll be FOMO'ing from afar and really hope you go if you have a book dream up your sleeve. Tell her I sent you!!

Other stray loves: March is Women's History Month, and the Smithsonian has this awesome oral history project!! Is anyone as obsessed with CocoFloss as me?? Talk about gratifying. My friend Steph gifted me a vintage stamp roll holder and WOW, this is my new favorite vintage treasure to find!! Because I've been participating in the Sunday Letter Project so, been going thru LOTS of stamps. You should join us!

PASS IT ON

Stories are heirlooms. Here's one of mine:

You're Not Lost published 8 years ago. AND, the gals are still reading my book and hosting their book clubs (a joy!!!). Yesterday, two amazing women (shout-out to Megan and Ella!) who run a leadership program for Lehigh student athletes invited me to come do a sesh around YNL. Lehigh was my alma mater, where I also played volleyball, so that was an easy hell yes. It was SO much fun channeling that liminal period of time, where you're finally a senior, living it up in your last few months of college, but you're also sorta/totally freaking out about the life that comes next, but also want to be in that “grown up” life REALLY badly. It's the same in between where our “lost” feeling come up, and it's the same in-between where building up a deep sense of self belief can help us build an internal compass, and to settle into the unknown like its a warm bath, not an alligator-filled swamp. Because! The steps create the path, rather than the other way around.

Lehigh volleyball is such an important part of my path (and still the source of my dearest friends in the world, hi galsssss), so these moments are so full circle, and really such a gift. You can watch a bit more about the sesh here.

Woman on xx